Friendship and Frances Ha

Thursday night, I scheduled a Meetup to go see Frances Ha with other women my age at Cinema 21 here in Portland. I'd never been to this theater before, and it was pretty great. They serve wine (and beer, I think, but I prefer wine so that's what I saw), and the (only) theater is pretty big. They show more indie-type films, a fact that, right there, makes me think of my good friend, Adrienne.

So Frances Ha was awesome. And it made me think of Adrienne. You see, what I got out of this movie was the friendship that it showed between two women in their late 20s. Most of the time, Frances is kind of awkward and flailing in life, but there are moments where she really shines. There are times where she seems to care way more about a person than they do about her (or vice versa), and I could relate to that. But in the end, Frances is always there, always caring about her best friend.

I wanted to cry at the end, but felt a little awkward since I was there with some women I had only just met. When we came out of the theater and talked about the movie, I couldn't help but actually start crying because I said that that friendship between Frances and her best friend, that's me and Adrienne. And Adrienne lives far away. And that's hard.

At the Oregon Brewers Festival last Summer. We may or may not be inebriated.

Like Frances and her best friend, Adrienne and I have had our fair share of ups and downs. In all honesty, it's a miracle we ever became friends. She's very science-minded, and I'm very arts-minded. She was a bit of a tomboy, and I love glitter. She's a morning person, and I'm more of a night owl (when I manage to stay awake long enough). She's getting her PhD, and I have a BA in French. But French is what brought us together.

We met in "French Club" at OSU- I was vice president and she was secretary. I call it "French Club" because we honestly didn't do a whole lot. All I really got out of it was this friendship, based solely on the fact that we both were going to be studying abroad in the same town the following year. We booked our airplane tickets together, still not really knowing each other. We really got to know each other on the plane rides over to France (PDX>Chicago>CDG). I was a blubbering mess, heading into the unknown. She was a chatterbox with way too much luggage. Somehow we clicked. I helped her get all of her suitcases down the escalator, and she helped me keep my mind off of how scared I was.

That year in Poitiers cemented our friendship. We traveled together several times, despite the fact that she hated my travel style (plan everything, see everything). Sometimes we argued, but any argument was easily forgotten over some tiramisu and some wine.

When we returned to the states, right before school started, my uncle killed himself and Adrienne helped me get through that time. We supported each other through our reverse culture shock (it's real and it's hard). Then that January, when my grandmother passed away, Adrienne brought brownies and a Hitchcock movie to help me feel better (it didn't, but it was another thing that enriched our friendship).

After college, our paths diverged, taking me to France while Adrienne finished up at OSU. When I came back home, it was Adrienne who was moving around- Monterey for her Master's, Australia, Texas for her PhD. Now, in a good year, we'll see each other twice. And every time, it's like no time has passed at all. We still can crack each other up with a simple look. And it's that quality of our friendship that I saw in Frances Ha.

Do you have a close friend like that? Have you seen Frances Ha? I'd love to hear from you in the comments below.

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